Somewhere someplace, I must have lost my self esteem and confidence. I view myself as pretty much failure in everything I do and I never seems to accomplish and get anything out of what I do.
I tend to judge myself so much that I'm often demotivated by my own judgements. I'm totally obessed with everything that it actually breaks me.
Sometimes, it's like I'm living my life to impress others and not living life to the fullest. I try so hard and yet I never seem to be satistified with myself.
I struggle day in day out with something I've been battling for ages, but I never seem to achieve it. Do I really have to succumb to drastic measures?
I critise myself too often this days, till I actually get really down and my self esteeem seems to go down the drain.
Why can't I just be happy with who I am and let all critics and judgements wheeze past me and not affect me.
Everyday, I seem to be putting on a plastic smile. It's getting really hard to do so. Sometimes, I really want to want to break down and cry. But I never seem to be able to do so. Everything's just trap in me.
At times, I feel neglected and alone. I feel like I'm a living shadow. I seem to be invisible to all those around me.
I'm sick of putting on a happy face and plastic smile. I'm just soo sick of it.
People around me has already realised that I'm not the same perky person they all know. I hate to admit this but I'm just so fed up with everything, I've lost the meaning of life.
The happiness and the wonders of the world has all been lost along the way.
I'm juts so sick and fed up.
Period.
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