I've Got A Feeling

When things go bad and sour and you have no one to count on and not even ANYONE can help you solve your problems and distress, THE LORD GOD ALMIGHTY can do everything.

FOR ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE IN HIM WHO BELIEVES. AMEN.

The past few days and week has been like A TOTAL GOONER week and days for me, there was not one day that I could actually go through without having to fake happiness and portray a FAKE SMILE. but something happened to me and it's definitely an act of GOD a blessing, a miracle deep from within HIM.

I've got to admit this totally that I have been totally backsliding in everything from going to church, from classes to doing my work. I can just ZONE out in class and my lecturer's voice can just drown and I would be in some ZONE of my own. EEKK thats BAD. and I can suddenly snap back to class and wonder where on earth my lecturer is at now.

Sometimes I do wonder and ask GOD why is all this happening to ME? WHY ME? and sometimes as I sit in class I wonder what in the world am I doing here in LAW school? is this what i really want? Is this what YOU want for me? I question myself so often that at a point i wanted to GIVE UP.

The power of prayer is INDEED something so miraculous and something so awesome that you just cant DESCRIBE it in words. Since the second week of Law School, a few of us from my class would gather together and we just pray for whatever prayer needs we have. and trust me I haven had this kind of experience and encounter before until I started uni.

Today something happened. While we were praying just me, May Zhen and Joel. A voice from within spoke to me and said "Elaine everything is just going to be fine and go ahead and be happy". those words were indeed such inspirational words that totally lifted me up and I could suddenly feel like my heart's burden has all been lifted.

We prayed and ask God for wisdom and courage that this was indeed what we wanted and GOD has his purpose of placing each and everyone of us where we are now. and it suddenly DAWNED on me the way things has been unfolding and leading me to my pathway of law school.

It brought me back to the night where I remembered how a friend actually out of the blue suddenly told me that PLACES IN READING U were being grabbed up FAST and that limted places was available. as strange as it seems that very evening I had decided to fill in the application form that has been lying on my table for MONTHS and ages and when I called the next am, I still remember so very clearly Miss Yoges telling me there were only 3 PLACES left and I rushed there immediatly. If it wasn't God's will for me to be in law school, he wouldnt have spoke to me through my friend and that I probably wont be where I be today now.

and as for now, GOD has placed me with a bunch of really great people who really has the passion for HIM and this is indeed a sign from him to tell me that Hey it's time to come back on track.

Today I could smile for REAL for once be HAPPY for once. And i Thank God for never forsaking me and I thank GOD for all his blessings that he has never failed to shower me with.

Indeed HE has every purpose for us here on earth.

Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you

the desires of your heart.

Psalm 37:4

and suddenly the sky and clouds look so blue today

like they had never been for a long time

its 2 am now and I am HALLUCINATING

thanks to my textbooks and the computer screen. reading font size 10 for the whole day doesnt do your eyes any good neither does it for you soul.

RAMBLINGS.

nights world. =)

White Flag Red Flag?

you said you wanted me to move on and be happy

and to my pursue my own happiness.

In the quest of that you said that you will always be there to support me and be my side.

so why is it now that AGAIN and AGAIN you are always there standing there as an obstruction, a barrier

one that you know I can never go over no matter how and what I do.

I dont understand how we all got tangled in this mess but all I know

is I want a way out but we're so deep into the maze and when I think I have found the way out

you make the ending so much more complicated.

it's REAL BAD to know that the one hurting me now is YOU.

what is it that you want? I cant seem to figure you out anymore.

I try so HARD to put it aside but I cant because its you and me in this game now.

I just wish that there is some kind of explanation to this and this is not for real.

I'm trying so HARD just to act normal in front of you like nothing has happen or nothing is happening but I think soon I cant do this anymore.

we do everything together but this time the boat is too small for both of us

it's either one of us have to leave or we'll both end up in a sunken boat.

forgive me if I dissapoint you one day.

I'm already on the verge of breaking down

but i know i can't.

i can't do this anymore for real

Change

LAW SCHOOL has been fun so far for now. =) minus the fact that the classrooms can be freezing COLD like crazy and the next classroom its so HOT.

Taylors better do something about the air conds before all our brain enzymes get mushed up.

Time to sacrifice a whole lot of things for now. OPPORTUNITY COST. =)

ELAINE CHIN FOCUS AND STUDY.

Hate the fact that everyday I have to wear a mask

and put on a smile for everyone to see

when deep inside I'm more crushed then crushed ice.

it hurts even more when it's you're the one.

Sometimes I dont even know how to face you.

and I wonder how I do it.

Gummy Bears <3

I have survived 1 week of uni. =) not that lectures has started besides orientation the whole week. *biggie yawns* but YES i survived it. =D

The begining week of 2010 will somewhat be a very memorable time of the month as we tried to cramp in every single piece of fun and randomness we could into the week before uni actually started.

The BIG BANG for 2010 started of with NYE. Spent NYE with the same group of people as last year and again and and HAD AN AWESOME time. =D what better way is there than to usher in the new year with friends. =D

2 January 2010

headed over to anthea's place to give Kane a b'day suprise. it was kinda amusing watching him blow those candles. =D

5 January 2010

The day where Zhuxiao finally showed off her driving skills to the world like for REAL. =D ok this is pay back time for what she wrote on my FB status. =)

review in summary: I think she was very lucky that day that i didnt have breakfast that am or else I would have puked in the car. =s HAHAHAHA. as to quote Anabel. "she loves the brake so much there is not a need for us to get life insurance"

ok la, not going to be MEAN to you so yes her driving skills improved when we were on the way home. THANK GOD.

It was just great spending time just us 3 and doing all sorts of random things and yes yes. =D

9 January 2010

The last weekend of my holls. =D now this was FUNNER. I think I laughed so much till my jaws actually hurt.

it was a day that we decided to go famish ourselves with SS 15 food. =D come to think of it, I really miss the food there! =) we satisfied every single temptation from JOJO to Snowflake. =D

i think FOOD wasnt the main thing that day, it was my great awesomeeeeeeeee street smartness of driving anti-traffic all the way along the road in front of Taylors. actually I dont know what happen to me but I seriously did not realise for a split second the road was a one way road until Jitve and Li Tjen started LAUGHING and zx went OMGGGGGGG. =D

and and so classes has started. =) "JOY" and I survived driving to uni for a week, but next week SOBS la have to go there EARLY because why Taylors management must be so KIND to everyone and let everyone with the green sticker park inside and hence therefore we have to go early to GRAB parking. =(

Went back to MC yest and and saw everybody. =D nostalgic moments. and and today after class I went to MPH at Ou and the awesome Li Tjen was there. *she made me type this* and we had a SUPER fast update session. =D

it amuses me the way you react to things. =)